Missed Connections

Sorry for running naked thru the neighborhood – m4w (West Side)

 

To whom it may concern:
I apologize for running naked through the neighborhood at around 8:00 pm this evening. I was deathly afraid that I would lose something that is extremely important to the effect of me being a man.
As you see, I was partaking in an activity with my g/f when she became enraged at the fact that I knew about her affairs with another man. She informed me that she was going to get something that would make things a little more interesting. When she returned she had one of our kitchen knives in her hand.At that point I was not about to take any chances and immediately took the initiative to seek safety in a friends house down the block. I was lacking common sense and did not spare a moment to become dressed. Thus the reason that I was not wearing any clothes.At this point all is well and I do not want any ill will with any of my trusting neighbors. The situation has been rectified and order has been returned to my household, with the absence of my now ex g/f.
Thank you for your understanding,
The naked runner

 

Naughty at a Funeral – w4m (Wis Dells)

 

I am looking for the guy that I banged at my uncle’s funeral 2 weeks ago. We were sitting next to each other and you started rubbing my leg while trying to comfort me. You told me that I was beautiful and next thing I knew, we were walking to the bathroom. I’m really worried because you never did say how you knew my uncle and I’m freaking out that we could be related. If not, I thought maybe we could continue where we left off. Maybe it was because it was taboo, but it was so HOT. I don’t think the funeral director knew what to think when we walked out of the bathroom together. Anyways, I hope to hear from you…