K:Women for Men: Checkin out those hams, fam
Sorry that title was just to grab your attention, but full disclosure you do have a weirdly nice butt and I was looking at it. We met and talked for a bit this past weekend at boulders climbing gym. I was there chaperoning our youth group so I never got the chance to ask you out. I’ve never climbed before and you helped me out. You must go all the time because your crazy strong. I belayed, I guess, for you after and DAMN Boiii! You got some serious buns hun, and I want some. I won’t get the chance to go back for a while so please find this and email me. I’m not good at rock climbing but let me throw you onto my bed and show you what sport I’m good at. Its an all night marathon though and be warned I will spank that booty. I know I seem a bit like an awkward goof in public, but under the sheets I’m a freak. So wrap those hams up and come over. I’ll bring the leather and whips.
A:Men for Women:Whats up grieving hottie
I saw you last Saturday at forest hill cemetery. I actually am a groundskeeper there, so please don’t think I’m some creep that trolls the graveyard looking for sweet trim. Usually people don’t catch my eye, but you did. You had short curly blonde hair and nice curves. You had on a purple jacket and this light green colored hat. I’ve never been this attracted to a women before. You cleaned up around the grave and left shortly after. I checked out the grave after you left.It seemed like it was your husband or boyfriend or something, but the point is your probably single. I’ll make sure to take special care of that headstone form now on. Maybe we could go on a date sometime. I’m really not the dating type, maybe its because I don’t get to meet many alive people in my job (that was a joke). I have a good sense of humor and I’ve been told I’m not bad a sex. If you would like to try this then message me, and maybe we can turn that frown upside down.